


I can't Begin to Quit You.

by theomnisquid



Category: Night at the Museum (2006 2009)
Genre: AU, High School AU, Homophobic Language, M/M, Non-Canon Relationship, homophobic violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-11
Updated: 2015-11-15
Packaged: 2018-03-07 02:30:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 15
Words: 18,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3157832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theomnisquid/pseuds/theomnisquid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Octavius tells himself that he won't do this thing with Jed again this year. He tells himself he is done. He won't give in. Not this year.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Oh look. It is the High School AU that no one asked for. But secretly everyone wants.

They had been in school for 37 days when Jed slides into the bench next to Octavius at lunch, swiping the apple off his tray.

“Hey there Toga-boy.” Jed greets as he bites into Octavius’ apple. Octavius stares longingly at his apple for a moment before turning back to poke with his fork at the lump of mystery meat the cafeteria touts as meatloaf.

“I wore a toga once for a school play back in freshman year. Please stop calling me toga boy.” Octavius mutters, giving up on the meatloaf and takes to stabbing at his cold, lumpy, sorry excuse for mashed potatoes.

“Yeah, yeah, I remember that. It was Orange Julius. You played the guy with the same name as yours.” Jed says around a mouthful of apple. Wiping his chin with the back of his hand as a bit of the juice from the apple runs down it.

“The play was called Julius Caesar, you heathen.” Octavius hisses. He grimaces a bit in disgust as Jed sets the half eaten apple back on his tray.

“Yeah, well it was booooring. Didn’t understand half of what you guys were saying. Although I did like the part where you all stabbed that Orange Julius guy.” Jed snorts a little and punches Octavius on the arm. Octavius rolls his eyes and decides he isn’t hungry anymore. He has one leg swung over the bench, his back to Jed, when Jed leans in and whispers in his ear.

“My place tonight? We can study together.” Jed’s hand roughly squeezes Octavius’ thigh before quickly retracting and Jed is sauntering off to go hit on a table full of cheerleaders. Octavius ignores the way his thigh burns from Jed’s touch as he dumps his tray in the garbage.

He doesn’t go over to Jed’s house that night. Instead he stays home and watches Hairspray to distract himself from the thoughts of Jed.

A week later, Jed plops down in the chair next to Octavius in the science lab. Octavius opts to ignore the cowboy, focusing on reviewing his notes for their upcoming test in class today.

“You never came over the other day.” Jed tells him casually, propping his dusty boots up on the table next to Octavius’ neatly written notes. Octavius wrinkles his nose and slides his notes away.

“Go away.” Octavius hisses under his breath.

“Come over tonight. I really could use help studying.” Jed flashes a smile at Octavius and Octavius can feel his heartbeat quicken.

"I’m not doing this again. I’m done with it. Not this year.” Octavius whispers mostly to himself, but he knows Jed can hear him. For a minute there is a silence between the two of them. The only sounds are the scratching of pencil on paper and whispered conversations and from other students around them. then the bell rings and Jed’s feet are sliding off the table. Octavius expects him to just go back to the back of the classroom where he always sits with the other football players. But Jed is suddenly in his face, his breath smelling like stale cool ranch doritos.

“Come over tonight.” he says, no commands Octavius before straightening back up. As he turns to leave he knocks Octavius’ notes on the floor.

“Had to teach ol’ Toga boy a lesson.” Jed drawls he walks back to his seat. Octavius feels his ears burning as he crouches down to gather his things. Ignoring the laughter from the back. Ahkmenrah sits in the seat next to him as the bell rings, eyebrows raised at the disorder of Octavius’ normally well organized notes. Octavius just shaked his head and turns his attention up to the teacher.

Despite his declaration earlier in the day of being done with Jed, Octavius finds himself sitting in his car in the driveway of Jed’s family ranch. His hands grip his steering wheel tightly, he stares out the window and watches Jed bring his horse in tight around a barrel and then straightening the horse to bring him on home.

“22.6. You need to bring him in a bit tighter my boy.” A warm late summer breeze, along with their history teacher Mr. Roosevelt’s voice drifts through Octavius’ half cracked windows in his car. Jed slows his horse, a chestnut quarter horse with one white sock on his left foreleg in front of Roosevelt.

“Competition is in just a few weeks. You sure you don’t want to try a Roosevelt tells him, placing a hand on one of the horses reigns and squinting up at Jed. Jed leans forward and pats the sweaty neck and his horse before answering.

“Nah, I like Trigger. He may not know the barrels like Texas does, but we have a connection.” Jed says as he dismounts Trigger.

Octavius’ right hand hovers now just over his shift knob. Ready to throw his car into reverse and peel out of the driveway and back home when Jed’s eyes meet his and Jed grins at him, tipping his cowboy hat in greeting to Octavius. Octavius sighs, opens the car door and pulls himself out.

“Howdy partner.” Jed greets Octavius as he walks up to the corral.

“Hello there, Mr. Gaius. What brings you out here? I didn’t realize you and Mr. Smith were friends. I never see you two together at school.” Roosevelt calls out from where he is standing in the pen. Octavius looks over at Jed and can feel himself blushing.

“Aw, Mr. Roosevelt. Octy here and I aren’t really friends. Different hierarchies at school and all that.You know, I’m top tier, school royalty and Octy is that weird drama kid. But Octy is a right pal and offered to help me pull my grade up in your class.” Jed smirks at Octavius for a second before staring at their Teacher, daring him to question them. Octavius feels a bit offended that Jed called him weird. Theodore “Teddy” Roosevelt studies his two students carefully, eyes flicking between the two boys.

“Well Octavius is one of my brightest students and you, Mr. Smith are not. Not offence.” Teddy observes.

“Aw, teach. You wound me.” Jed says with a slight frown. “Anyway, are we done with the training for today, sir? Need to get to studying and all that.”

Teddy doesn’t anything, instead watching Octavius fidget nervously not quite looking him in the face. Finally he nods his consent and reminds Jed to wipe Trigger down well before putting him to the pasture for the night. He pauses at Octavius’ side on his way to his truck.

“My classroom is always open, son. If you ever want to talk.” He tells Octavius and then is in his truck and is driving off in a cloud of dust.

Octavius stares at Jed’s back as he walks his horse into the barn. He tells himself, he should get in his car and drive away. But his feet disagree with his brain and he finds himself following Jed into the barn. He leans against a stall door, watching the muscles in Jed’s arm flex as he rubs the brush across the horse’s coat.

“Why was Mr. Roosevelt over here?” Octavius asks after a while.

“Believe it or not, the dude’s a pro barrel racer. Or at least was back in the day. He’s helping me train for a big barrel racing competition in a couple months.” Jed responds, pausing briefly in his brushing to look at Octavius.

“Are you..are you any good at it?” Octavius asks, curious despite himself. He wants to get to know Jed outside of school and outside of whatever it is that they have been doing for the last two years. He hates to admit it, but he wants this thing between them to be something more. To be something real. So if he knows Jed inside and out, he can pretend it is real.

“Nah, I’m right shit at this barrel racing stuff. Much prefer bulldogging. But my pops thinks I should be well rounded in my rodeo career.”” Jed laughs and tosses the brush into a nearby tack bucket.

“Bull dogging?” Octavius asks confused, raising an eyebrow at Jed.

“Yeah, yeah. Bulldogging. You know, when a cowboy rides up on a steer and jumps off his horse to wrestle the steer to the ground by the horns.” Jed stares incredulously at Octavius as if he can’t believe the other teen doesn’t know what steer wrestling is. Octavius just shrugs a shoulder at Jed.

“Don’t tell me, you’ve never been to a rodeo?” Jed can feel his jaw dropping. Octavius shakes his head, feeling slightly embarrassed that he doesn’t know what Jed is talking about.

“How long have you lived here?” Jed asks, walking over to Octavius.

“All my life, you know that. We’ve been classmates since kindergarten.” Octavius replies, straightening up as Jed comes to a stop in front of him. Jed’s arms going up around his on either side of his head; caging him in.

“You mean, you’ve never been to the biggest little rodeo in the midwest? The one that our town has been putting on for the past 80 years?” Jed asks, his breath hot against Octavius’ skin. Octavius swallows roughly and shakes his head., breathing out a strangled no as Jed’s teeth scrape against his skin.

“I’ll have to fix that then.” Jed tells him before latching his lips to Octavius’ clavicle and sucking at his skin. Octavius moans, bringing his hands up to hook his fingers in Jed’s belt loops, pulling the cowboy closer.

Jed responds by pushing a leg between Octavius’ legs, rubbing himself roughly against the other boy. Mouth still latched to Octavius’ skin. Octavius pants loudly in Jed’s ear, his own body pressing back against Jed desperately. Octavius can feel himself close to cumming. Knows that it will be an awkward drive home with sperm dried against his pants. But all he can think about is how Jed’s lips feel against his skin. Suddenly Jed is pulling away from him. Octavius wants to grab him and pull him back in. to crash his lips against Jed’s. He wants Jed, all of him.

“Blow me” Jed tells him. Octavius nods, sinking to his knees on the dirty barn floor. Hands, going for Jed’s belt buckle. Tongue licking his lips as he releases Jed’s cock from his pants. Octavius glances up at Jed to see if Jed is watching him. But Jed has pushed his hat down over his eyes. Jed’s hand tightens in Octavius’ close cropped hair. Octavius licks his lips one last time before closing them around Jed’s cock.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for all the cussing and derogatory terms.
> 
> *****************************************************

The next day, Ahkmenrah pulls Octavius roughly into the boy’s bathroom at school.

“What’s wrong with you?” Octavius hisses at the Egyptian foreign exchange student, yanking his arm from Ahk’s grip. Ahk doesn’t answer, instead turning Octavius to face the bathroom mirror.

“Shit!” Octavius exclaims hands flying up to a dotting of bruises along his neck. “Shit, shit, shit!” Ahk laughs at Octavius and pulls his scarf from around his neck, holding it out to Octavius.

“Here you go my friend. I didn’t think you wanted to display your love bites for everyone to see.” Ahkmenrah says as Octavius takes the scarf with a mumbled thanks, wrapping it around his neck.

“I didn’t even know you were in a relationship with anyone. They should consider themselves lucky for snagging such a gentleman as you.” Ahk observes as they walk out of the bathroom together.

“I’m not. Not really. It’s just...it’s...well..it’s nothing. Complicated, really.” Octavius tells him truthfully as he adjusts his backpack over his shoulders, making his way to his locker. Ahk raises an eyebrow at his friend and follows Octavius to the lockers.

“And may I inquire as to who this complicated thing is with?” Ahk asks, leaning a shoulder into the locker beside Octavius’. Oct glances at the Egyptian before shoving his bag into the locker.

“ I really don’t want to talk about it. I’m not even sure how to explain things. One minute he is harassing me and making me feel like dirt. Then the next, I’m on my knees and can’t get enough of him.” Oct sighs and slams his locker shut. Ahk stares at him.

“Too much information, my friend.” Ahk says, pushing away from the lockers and slinging an arm around Octavius’ shoulders. Both boys make their way into the throng of students, all making their way to their various classes. Ahkmenrah says goodbye to Octavius outside the gymnasium before trying to push his way to through the crown to his own class.

Octavius hated gym class. It wasn’t that he was uncoordinated or clumsy or anything. Quite the opposite really. He was very physically fit. In fact, was an excellent swordsman, having taking several sword fighting lessons a few towns over.

No, he hated gym class because his gym period was filled with jocks and he despised the jocks at his school. They were almost literally the text book description of a meat head. Octavius hated gym class because those meatheads made it miserable.  
To solidify his point a group of jocks were crowded in front of the locker he had claimed as his in the locker room. Octavius sighs and pushes his way through the crowd to his locker.

“Hey Tavy.” One of them begins, Octavius can’t remember his name. Probably something like Jim Bob or Cecil or whatever these rednecks that lived in this town liked to name their spawn. Octavius opens his locker and begins to pull out his gym clothes, sitting them on the bench near him.

“Heard you like bending over for just about anyone’s dick. How about you bend over and try mine on for size.” The jock finishes to the hoots of laughter from his friends.

Octavius sighs heavily, shutting his locker before turning to look the jock up and down.

“Didn’t know you were gay. Hell of a way to come out though. Or did your friends already know? Are they gay too? I bet you guys all have been gay orgies in here after football practice.” Octavius can’t help but smirk at the jocks’ dumbfounded expressions.

“Well it would seem like your friends didn’t know that you swung for my team.”” Octavius gets out before the jock is knocking him to the ground.

“Take that back, you fucking faggot!” I ain’t no cock sucking pansy.” He shouts in anger, spittle flying all over Octavius’ face. 

“Well you’re the one who said that you wanted to stick your cock in my pert little ass.” Octavius says because he has no sense of self preservation. Octavius’ head hits the locker room’s tiled floor with a crack and he can see stars bursting behind his eyes.

The jock’s hands are around his neck and he is letting out a string of very colorful expletives. Through the pounding in his ears, he can hear the other two jocks cheering their friend on. Just as Octavius is thinking that this is how he dies, the jock is ripped away from Octavius gulps for air and struggles to sit up.

Jed is standing in between him and the other jock. Octavius can’t help but to stare at at the way the cotton gym shorts - a size too small - hugs Jed’s ass and is amaze that Jed would come to his rescue. Like his own personal knight and shining armor. Maybe, just maybe, Jed did care for him.

“Hey now, Jimmy. You don’t want to be touching that trash. Who knows what kind diseases it is carrying.” Jed sneers looking back over his shoulder at Octavius. Octavius almost swears he also sees Jed wink at him.

Octavius first is that his original guess to that jock’s name isn’t too far off. His second thought is that of course Jed doesn’t care about him. Of fucking course. His final thought is how much he hates the fucking bastard as he launches himself across the locker room floor at Jed’s legs. His teeth sink into Jed’s calf. Jed screeches wildly and pulls futile at Octavius’ short cropped hair. The metallic taste of Jed’s blood blooms in Octavius’ mouth. He can hear the clatter of the other boys as everyone scrambles over to them to spectate the fight. But Octavius is focused on the pounding in his head, the black spots speckling in his eyes and the taste of Jed’s blood in his mouth.

Distantly he hears a new voice join the pulse of disjointed voices before he is pulled roughly away from Jed. His teeth tearing Jed’s skin. Mr. Hun, their gym teacher hold Octavius roughly by the back of his shirt and grabs Jed’s ear in the other one before marking both boys out of the gym and to the principal's office.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Took a lot longer to get this one up than planned. But I was hoping to make it longer. So short chapter is short.

Octavius stares at Principal McPhee, refusing to shift his gaze even a smidge over to Jed who is slumped down in the chair beside him. Mr.Hun stands to the right of McPhee’s desk staring sternly at the boys with his arms crossed over his chest. behind the boys, the school’s security guard, Larry Daley paces, his keys jangling noisily against his large flashlight.

McPhee sighs and leans back in his chair. He doesn’t say a word, just shrugs at the boys with a slight frown. Despite himself, Octavius shrinks into his chair.

“Well I honestly don’t know what to say. Fighting in the boy’s locker room? Really”” McPhee says finally. Beside him, Jed snorts and picks a the bandage wrapped around the bite on his leg.

“And biting? Really Octavius? Are you some kind of animal?’ McPhee asks eyes focused on Octavius.

“He fornicates like one.” Jed spits out and it is all Octavius can do not to launch himself at Jed.

“Jedidiah.” Larry says warningly, coming up and placing a firm hand on Jed’s shoulder. Oct smiles up at Larry. He knew he had always liked Larry better than the other security guards. McPhee clears his throat and stands; moving around to lean against the front of his desk.

“I don’t care who fornicates with who or how they do it either. Quite frankly the sex lives of my students is not something I want to be involved in.” McPhee leans forward closer to the two teens. A serious expression on his face. Octavius tries to swallow the lump forming in his throat.

“I should expel the both of you.”  
“What?! No!” Both boys shout. Jed sitting up in his chair and Octavius jumping out of his. McPhee holds a hand up, waiting for the boys to stop their shouting.

“I won’t though. I’m not that heartless. I understand you both have after-school activities that you would not be able to participate in if I did so.” McPhee informs them. Octavius slowly sinks back into his chair. His heart beating a million miles a minute. Jed lets out a loud sigh of relief. 

“However. I do still need to punish the both of you. So you will both have detention every night after school for the next two months.”

“But what about play practice?” Octavius moans.

“Yeah or football practice for me? Both start right after school.” Jed exclaims.

“Fine then. Saturday detentions.” Mcphee snaps, pushing himself off the front of his desk and walking back around to his chair. “Larry will escort the both of you back to the locker room. Get dressed and go to your next class. And I don’t want to see you two fighting anymore. This is a school not a boxing ring for Christ’s sake.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning kids, this one gets slightly porn-y.
> 
> Also I want to send out a sincere thank you to the fan that took time out of their day to email me about how much they are enjoying this fic. I've been having a bad month and your comment/review meant the world to me. And I hope I don't let you down with this chapter or any future ones.

Larry stands awkwardly off to the side of them in the locker room. Generally Larry’s job consists of walking the halls, busting kids who aren’t in class and one time a drug deal bust that was nothing more than a freshman selling his mom’s prescription sleeping pills out of his locker room. His job didn’t entail babysitting two teenaged boys as they changed. He was, to say the very least, uncomfortable.  
Octavius stares into his gym locker. His mind in turmoil over what was going on. Just last night things between him and had seemed different; as if things were reaching a turning point in their relationship. But then today...he just didn’t get it. what was going in Jed’s head? And Larry’s awkward fidgeting didn’t help him any either.

“It’s ok Larry.” Octavius says, pulling out his normal clothes and hugging them to his chest. “You can go, we won’t fight.” Larry stares at Octavius uncertainly, eyes flicking over to Jed, who has his gym shirt pulled halfway off.

“Yep no fight here, Kemosabe.” jed smirks, pulling the shirt all the over his head and dropping it on the floor of the locker room.

“Alright, no fighting. I’ll be back in ten minutes to escort the both of you to your classes.” Larry gives each boy a long hard look before turning and walking out of the room. Octavius sits on the bench between him and Jed, back to the cowboy and sets his clothes on the bench beside him. Behind him he can hear the soft rustle of fabric on Jed’s gym shorts as they are pulled down and thrown to the floor with Jed’s gym shirt. Octavius bends forward and begins unlacing his gym shoes. Pulling off first his left one and then his right, neatly tucking his laces into the shoes before setting them neatly side by side next to him on the bench. His shirt was next, off and folded neatly.

Jed’s toned arms slide over his shoulders and down his waxed chest as he is reaching for his normal shirt, coming to a rest just above the waistband of his gym shorts, long fingers playing with the short’s drawstring. His arms pulling Octavius back against his chest, hair pricking at Octavius’ back. jed’s breath washes hot over Octavius as he nibbles Octavius’ left ear. Octavius leans back into Jed’s touch, eyes closing and he lets his mind shut down as Jed’s fingers make their way down the front of his gym shorts, wrapping around his member to slowly, lazily stroke it.

“Jed...we’re at school..I don’t think we should…” Octavius tells him with no real meaning behind the words and no movement to stop jed. He is still angry at Jed’s words from earlier. Still wounded by them.

“You don’t know what you do to me.” Jed whispers against the shell of Octavius’ ears. and no Octavius doesn’t know what he does to Jed. Octavius can’t even begin to understand him. Less than two hours ago Jed was slinging insults and slurs at him. Now jed’s hand was quickly working him to climax in the boy’s locker room at school. jed was a mystery that Octavius wasn’t sure he wanted to solve.

Jed’s hand moves away from Octavius cock and Octavius moans in frustration from the loss of contact. Jed’s laughs at Octavius. A short husky laugh and swings himself around to the front of Octavius, calloused hands pushing on his chest. Pressing him to lie back down against the wood bench. Octavius’ clothes and shoes fall to the floor. Octavius presses his hips upwards with a moan as Jed straddles him. Fingernails digging into Jed’s hips as he nips lightly along Octavius’ throat, hand once again finding Octavius’ cock.

‘Drive me crazy.” Jed tells Octavius against the Roman’s throat.

“Can’t stop thinking about you.” He says as Octavius digs his nails harder into Jed’s hips, breaking skin.

“ ‘m not gay. Don’t know what I’m doing. Why are you stuck in my head all the time?” And Octavius wants to tell Jed, he hates him too. Hates him for making him fall so damned in love. But he is so close to climax that his mouth can’t form any words other than Jed’s name in one low husky moan.

“WHAT THE FUCK?” Larry’s voice cuts over them. Octavius’s climax never reached as Jed pushes away from him hard and fast. Octavius’ head snaps backwards cracking soundly on the wood of the bench. So hard, he sees stars burst behind his eyes for a moment. Between one moment and the next Jed is dressed and the locker room door is slamming shut behind him. Octavius sits up slowly, adjusting the waistband of his shorts to properly cover himself. And then he just sits there in a daze staring at his pile of things strewn over the floor. Knocked there during their...He blinks rapidly, he won’t cry. He can’t really fault Jed for running away like that. It is extremely embarrassing to have been caught like that.

He lets out a long shuddering sigh and reaches down to pick up his discarded clothes and start slipping them on. He barely registers Larry sitting down next to him.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So originally I was only planning on having this story being only about 3-4 chapters long. Chapter 5 is super short and I am working on chapter 6 currently with no clue when this thing is going to end.
> 
> It has gotten away from me. Please send help.

“Hey um…” Larry begins awkwardly by clamping a hand down on Octavius’ left shoulder and clearing his throat several times.

“ I get that when two young people are in love, they want too uh..”

“Jed isn’t in love with me.” Octavius interrupts.

“Oh..um..uh..Well you’re both young and you know hormones and stuff.” Larry shifts uncomfortable, right hand lifting up to pull at his collar. Suddenly feeling very hot. Octavius snorts a little and shakes his head, a smile despite his mood tugging at his lips.

“Larry, you are a good man.” The teen tells the security guard and means it. He appreciates Larry trying to talk him through this, even if it is one of the most embarrassing and awkward things to happen to him.

“I do have a teen son, freshman you know. I’ve seen my fair share of awkward with that boy.” Larry tells him and Octavius colors at the statement, averting his eyes from Larry.

“Tell you what.” Larry says, “I’ll tell McPhee you suddenly came down with a stomach bug and had to go home. I’m guessing that you probably aren’t in the mood for focusing on school work. And everyone could use a personal day once in a while.” Larry winks at him and gives his shoulder a squeeze before leaving Octavius alone in the locker room.

Octavius should go home. He should go home and practice his lines for the play that will perform in just two weeks. He should go home and finish his history report for Mr. Roosevelt’s class that is due on Friday. He should definitely just go home. He doesn’t though. He is stupid and drives over to Jed’s house. They need to talk and Octavius is the one who will have to make sure it happens.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of cussing in this one and it gets us nowhere, nowhere at all. So much conflict.

Octavius isn’t surprised to see Jed on his horse, running her round barrels. The horse’s neck is covered in flecks of sweat, corners of her mouth foamy. But Jed seems unaware of her discomfort, his eyes grim and his jaw set into a hardline as he brings her round another barrel. heels dig sharply with their blunt tip spurs into the mare’s flank pressing her to go faster still. Octavius parks his car and breathes deeply in and out; a vain attempt to slowly his own wildly beating heart. One that matched the pounding hoofbeats of Jed’s mare as she races round and round. He forces himself out of the car and shuts the door with a loud metallic slam.

“You’re going to run that horse to its death.” Octavius observes out loud. Hands coming up to grip the rail of the wooden corral fence.

“Fuck off.” Jed spits out, but he stops and dismounts his horse. Octavius’ nails dig into the wood grain as Jed stomps past him and out the corral’s gate. The gate swings shut loudly behind him and the horse’s shod hooves click-clack loudly down the paved drive. Octavius counts to ten before pushing away from the fence and forcing himself to follow jed into the barn. Even though he really wants to drive home and live in bed under the covers until he dies.

Inside the barn, Jed is aggressively brushing down his horse. Octavius sits down quietly on an overturn bucket. His lips quirking up in half a smile as his mind drifts to the events that took place the last time he was in this barn with Jed. He found himself taking in Jed’s form, t-shirt sleeves straining around his biceps, pulling taunt as his muscles moved the brush over the horse’s coat as his mind reminded him of the taste of Jed’s cock in his mouth. Octavius’ eyes moved down to watch the way Jed’s fingers held the brush and he thought about the way Jed would run his fingers over his scalp and tell Octavius that he should grow his hair out; so that Jed would have something to grab onto. As Octavius’ eyes swept over Jed’s ass and appreciated how the jeans hugged it, he for not the first time thought about how irreversibly he was in love with Jed.

“I love you.” He tells Jed and watches as the other tenn freezes, his body going rigid. Octavius can see the muscles in Jed’s jaw clenching and unclenching. And then Jed is slamming the brush to the barn floor. Horse startling and pulling against her halter with a surprised whinny.

“Get the fuck out.” jed screams at Octavius. Octavius jumps slightly, startled at Jed’s sudden outburst. 

“Jed…” He starts and stops not sure what to say. Instead he finds himself pushing off of the bucket and walking over to Jeds. Tentatively he reaches out and places his hands against Jed’s face. Willing Jed to love him as much as he loves Jed.

“Please.” he whispers against Jed’s lips before pressing his own against them. Jed’s hands reach up and hover for a minute just over Octavius’s hips. Fingertips just barely grazing over the soft cotton of Octavius’ t-shirt.

Octavius stumbles a little as Jed pushes him away. String of curses flowing out of Jed’s mouth at Octavius.

“I said get the fuck out. Get off my god damn property. Get out of my god damned life. I ain’t no fucking queer.” Jed seethes through clenched teeth, before turning to untie his horse from the hitch on the wall and walk her back to the pasture.

“Jed, I don’t know what you are.” Octavius calls after him. “But we have something. Whatever this is between us, it isn’t just about sex. Maybe...maybe it started that way. But you can’t tell me that you don’t feel something for me.”

Jed pauses just paces away from Octavius. A hand resting shakingly on the mane of his horse.

“Don’t lie to yourself, Jed. You feel something for me. You know you do. So stopping lying to yourself about it. Lie to anyone else, but not to yourself.” Octavius pauses to take a breathe. Hand reaching up to wipe roughly at his eyes.

“Just, please Jed?”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I've actually have had this chapter done for a couple weeks now. But I didn't really like it, I still don't really like it. But I can't seem to get it right now matter how much I try to redo it. So I'm posting it anyway. chapter 8 is done too. But I like that one less than I liked this one. So it will probably be awhile before I post the next one as I do really need to redo it.

Octavius returns to school two days later, his black eye just barely beginning to heal. Ahk leans casually against the locker next to his, half chewed twizzler hanging out of his mouth.

“You know,” Ahkmenrah says pulling the twizzler out of his mouth and chewing it slowly before swallowed. “If we were in my country, I could have have Jed buried up to his neck in the desert. Where the sun would slowly bake his skin til it boiled and melted away. All the while fire ants would crawl in his eyes and ear and nose and buzzards would fly overhead waiting to peck the flesh from his bones.”

Octavius pushes his locker closed and turns to raise an eyebrow at the Egyptian.

“Too dark?” Ahk asks with a frown on his face before popping the rest of the candy back in his mouth. Octavius snorts, pressing his locker close.

“Yeah my friend. that is way morbid. Plus what even makes you think it was Jed who did this.”

“Please spare me the clueless act, Octavius.” Ahk says around the twizzler. “The two days you were gone, Jed was in a most foul mood. He’d stare forlornly at your empty chair in our shared classes. There is also the fact that I’ve seen the way you to interacted in the past. Half the time you two were eye fucking each other hardcore. Your relationship wasn’t that secret. Plus right now you can’t seem to keep your eyes off him and instead of the usually lovey dovey newlywed let’s go bang on the lunchroom table look you have in your eyes, they are full of pain and desperate longing. So I’m assuming that shiner is from him and you two had some sort of fight. A big one by the looks of it.”

 

Octavius shifts his eyes away from where Jed is standing with his friends, face heating up.

“No! I….no!” he sputters, trying to deny everything.

“I’m not stupid.” Ahk informs him before walking away. Leaving Octavius to stare slack jawed after him.

“I haven’t been eye fucking that stupid cowboy or desperately longing after him today.” Octavius mutters to himself as he makes his way to history class. “It is only second period.”

Class drags, he has to fight the urge to turn around and look at Jed the whole time. Jed who is sitting only one back and one over to the right of him. He can’t focus on anything, Mr. Roosevelt says. He feels terrible. World History is probably one of his favorite classes this semester. He is particularly looking forward to the unit on Ancient Greece and Rome, having always felt an affinity for that time period.

He is sure he can feel Jed’s eyes on the back of his head He touches his black eye gently, self consciously. He won’t turn around and look at Jed. He won’t give him the time of day anymore. He was done with Jed. He should have listened to himself in the first place. He was done with whatever it was they had been doing. Still though, their relationship had never turned violent like it had recently.

“Mr. Gaius!” Mr. Roosevelt is leaning over his desk, an angry look on his face. Octavius startles, knocking a pen off his desk. His face heating up as the rest of his class snicker at him “While I’m sure your daydream was exhilirating, young Octavius. I would appreciate it if you paid attention in class. Now what can you tell me about Manifest Destiny?” 

“I don’t know.” Octavius mumbles sinking down in his chair. Roosevelt gives him a long look before sighing.

“Please see me after class, Octavius.” He says as he walks back to the front of the classroom. Octavius feels sick to his stomach.

“Can someone else please tell me what Manifest Destiny is?” Roosevelt asks as he stops in front of the white board.

“Manifest Destiny happened back in the Old West Days of America.” Jed drawls out smugly from one behind and one over from Octavius. “It was believed by those heading out west and other areas that it was their God given destingy to expand the country.””

“Basically correct.” Roosevelt replies. “19th century United States saw the rising desire for expansion. The time frame of this Manifest Destiny is usually associated to being between 1812, just after the War of 1812 to about 1860 and the beginning of the Civil War. It was during this time period that the borders of the United States as we now know them were defined

It didn’t take long for Roosevelt’s words to start blending together and the itch to turn around and stare at Jed returned. Damn Jed for messing up his ability focus on school and class. Once again his hand reaches up to poke gently at his bruised eye. He winces at the flash of pain and tries not to htink about the pure look of disgust and hatred on Jed’s face right before Jed’s fist had connected with his eye. And ok, so he had been wrong about Jed’s feelings. He was nothing more than a couple of warm and willing holes for Jed to put his dick in. Just a way to climax. He wonders if this is better. Being so in love with somoene who will never love you back and having them for just a moment. A moment that you can hold in your memories forever. Or if he would have preferred to have never said anything and never have ruined them.. To go on pretending that someday. They would get married, have a couple kids and do the whole picket fence th.ing.  
The bell rings, signalling the end of class. The rest of the class files out of the door as fast as they can. Octavius watches Jed walk out, his arm flung around a female classmates shoulders, both laughing over something. Octavius frowns and wills Jed to turn and look at him. He doesn’t and Octavius thinks about how Jed is not the white picket fence type. Octavius just wishes that Jed could be his Manifest Destiny. His by God’s given right


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another short chapter. I do have chapters 9 and 10 done with 11 being worked on. So expect at least 2 more chapters soon. And by soon I mean maybe by the end of June...I'm so lazy about actually typing them up and putting them online.

Theodore Roosevelt sits in the desk chair in front of Octavius, facing his student with a slight frown. Octavius stares at his desk and noisily clicks his pen. In and out, in and out. click, click, click.

“I’m sorry for not paying attention in class.” He mumbles. “But things have been complicated recently.”

“My boy, I’m not looking for an apology. I’ve said before that if you ever needed to talk that I was here for you. So I’m here right now and I think you could probably use to talk to someone.”

Octavius pauses in his pen clicking, carefully considering Roosevelt’s offer. He could use to vent to someone. To let out all his frustrations and have someone help him understand Jed. But, but he isn’t sure he can out jed like this. Not even to his favourite teacher. For as terrible as jed has been to him, he can’t bring himself to admit to his trysts with Jed, to open that can of worms for the school to metaphorically devour. He won’t ruin Jed’s reputation. He may not care about his own, but he does care about Jed’s.

“Thanks, sir. But I’m fine. I don’t really need to talk to anyone. It is nothing really.”

“If you say, you are fine. Then I guess you can go.” Roosevelt says with a bit of disappointment in his voice. Octavius continues to stare down at his desk, a frown gracing his own face. Pen held limply in his hand. He shakes his head clear after a moment or two and swipes his things off his desk and grips them tightly against his chest.

“Thank you sir...for...the ..uh.. concern.” Octavius almost falters and has to clear his throat a couple times to keep himself from telling Roosevelt everything about him and Jed. He practically runs out the door.

“Oh, Mr. Gaius,” Mr. Roosevelt calls out, stopping him just inside the doorway. “I know it isn’t any of my business. And you have already expressed you have no desire for my help. But I do think you should talk to someone about the complicated situation between you and Mr. Smith. Perhaps consider talking to the Guidance Counselor. Sacagawea is excellent at her job and will be an unbiased ear.

Octavius doesn’t acknowledge his teacher’s words, just walks out of the classroom. Not so gently closing the door behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also shoutout to anyone at Acen.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh wow an actual chapter of decent length. I have mixed feelings on this chapter. I feel the characters get a bit ooc here more than other chapters. There is a bit of uncalled for name calling in it too. Also I've realized that my timeline is probably all sorts of wonky. But I'm not too worried about his right now. I'll probably just go back and fix that later to make more sense.

It has been roughly a month since what Octavius refers to as the incident happened. And apart from the classes they share, he hasn’t seen nor heard from Jed. he has heard rumors that jed is now dating Amelia Earhart, a little sophomore ROTC member. He hasn’t seen them together. But a couple of the cast members are friends with Amelia and he often overhears them talking about her handsome new boyfriend. A new boyfriend who is a senior, rides horses and plays football. A new boyfriend named Jed, who is just so dreamy. He doesn’t care. At least that is what he tells himself. Opening night for the play is in just a couple days. He is too busy to think about Jed playing kissy face with some pathetic sophomore whore.

“Amelia’s boyfriend sent her flowers to class today.” One of the girls whispers loudly to another girl backstage as they all wait for the cue to go on stage. Octavius clenches his hand and relishes in the feel of his nails biting into the palm of his hand. He is sure that Amelia is probably a nice girl. She probably doesn’t even deserve any of the names he calls her in his head. But he is feeling a bit bitter right now. Scorned lover mentality and all that.

“Shut the hell up.” Octavius hisses at the girls. “Learn some fucking etiquette. Some of us are trying to listen for our cues and you ladies are being disrespectful.” The girls give him startled looks, but quiet down. Octavius crosses his arms and moves closer to the stage, trying to mentally prep himself to get into character.

After the rehearsal concludes as everyone is dressing into their street clothes or loitering around waiting for friends, Octavius can hear the whispers from the sophomore boys about how he had snapped at the girls and what kinda stick got shoved up his butt recently. And ok, maybe he should go apologize to the girls. He was probably a bit rude to them backstage. It is just, you don’t talk backstage, at all. It is bad manners and just rude. He doesn’t apologize, he just grabs his stuff and leaves. Opening night is only two days away and then he can just go about pretending that Sophomores don’t exist. Especially sophomores named Amelia and her perfect love life with Jed.

*******************************************************************************************************

the next day during lunch while Ahkmenrah is snatching fries off his tray and Octavius is telling him to go buy his own fries, one of the sophomores slides into the space next to him. A blush spread crossed her face.

“Hey sorry about last night at practice. It was really rude of me and my friends to be talking so loudly backstage like that.” The girls tells him, a hand placed gently on his forearm. Oct doesn’t respond, just smacks Ahk’s hand as the Egyptian once again tries to steal a fry.

“Anyway, I was wondering if I could make it up to you sometime? Maybe we could go bowling or get a pizza or something?” The girl’s blush deepens.

“You’re what? Fourteen?” Ahk asks her, his mouth full of stolen fries. The girl graces him briefly with a disgusted look.

“I’m 16.” The girl responds, shaking her head and staring at Octavius. Octavius doesn’t respond to her. he picks up a fry and dips it in ketchup, popping it in his mouth. he contemplates her offer. It sounds an awfully lot like a date and based on her blush, she means it to be a date. He supposes that if Jed has moved on, that he should as well. Maybe a relationship with a young impressionable girl is what he needs. And wow, even in his own head that sounds terrible. 

“Sorry Kiddo.” Ahkmenrah says before Octavius can swallow his fries and tell the girl no himself. Ahk drapes an arm around Octavius’ shoulders and slides closer into him. “This boy’s already spoken for. So take your sniffing somewhere else.”

“Oh! Oh! I didn’t. I’m sorry” The girl stammers “I mean, I’ve heard rumors that you were gay. But I had just thought that that was just Jed talking shit with his friends. I had noticed that you two bicker a lot. And Amelia says that Jed keeps going on and on about you and being gay and how he hopes you don’t stare at his ass too much in the locker room during gym class.. I’m sorry. I didn’t think you really were gay. I didn’t mean to offend you!”

Octavius stares blankly at this sophomore girl. Unsure of what to say or do. He is gay sure, or at least bisexual. And he supposes he should be offended that Jed is talking about how much he disgusts him to other people. But the thing is, Jed is talking about him. And his messed up lovestruck mind is stuck on that part. Jed is talk about him. Which means he is still on Jed’s mind.

He is vaguely aware of the sophomore girl stammering out a few more apologies and a promise to be more respectful at practice tonight before she scampers off back to her friends. It takes Ahkmenrah pinching him hard on the wrist to bring him back to reality.

“No way. Nope. Notuh. don’t even think about it.” Ahk tells him as he stands and grabs their trays.

“Ahk! My friend! Do you realize what this means?! Jed, he talks about me. He hasn’t gotten me out of his head!” Octavius exclaims jumping up and thumping Ahkmenrah excitedly on the back. Ahk huffs out an angry sigh and brings the trays down roughly on the tray return counter.

“Look, I know I haven’t known you that long. But I have liked you since I started my exchange program here at this tiny school at the beginning of the year.” Octavius freezes at Ahk’s words, remember Ahk’s arm settling around his shoulders and Ahk’s warmth as he had tucked his body in close. Hell, even the words his Egyptian friend had said to that girl.

“Oh Ahk...I’m flattered. Really I am.”

“Shut it, Octavius. I didn’t mean it that way.” Ahk says pushing him slightly on the arm. “I was just trying to to keep you from making a mistake.”

“A mistake? Jed was a mistake!” Octavius whispers harshly. “That girl would have just been a notch in my belt. A small tryst. Something to look back on when I had grandchildren and wonder what ever happened to her.” Ahk shakes his head and looks at his friend sadly.

“Do you even listen to yourself? You are so messed up in the head. I’m honestly kinda worried about you. Not ten minutes ago you were ecstatic because you thought Jed might still be hung up on you. Now he is a mistake and you’re willing to wet your dick on some girl you don’t even know or like?! Not to slut shame you, but have a little respect. Sleeping with random girls is not going to make Jed love you. Nor is it going to make you happy. Jed needs to grow up and get over his self hatred of his own sexual desires before he can make you a decent boyfriend. 

Octavius looks wounded and stares at Ahkmenrah with hurt and betrayal in his eyes. Ahk closes his own eyes and rubs at his temples.

“Octavius, you are my friend. I don’t to see you destroy yourself.” Ahk tells him. The bell rings and the noise level in the cafeteria increases as students set about throwing away their trash and putting away their trays. And despite all the noise, Octavius is able to pick out one voice. He scans the lunchroom until he finds the sandy mop of hair. Heart picking up as he watches Jed place a light kiss on his girlfriend’s cheek. His heart aches as Amelia smiles and snuggles closer to Jed.

“We must not be that good of friends then.” Octavius tells Ahkmenrah coldly. “Because then you would know that you are ridiculous. You would know that I am not about to destroy myself. I’m a teenager and I am entitled to one bad relationship in my lifetime. Also if I want to sleep with a random girl, I will do so. So mind your own god damn business.”

“Octavius! Octavius! Wait!” Ahk calls after him. But Oct ignores him, pushing his way roughly through the crowd. in a hurry to get away from his friend.

“Trouble in paradise?” Jed sneers as he and his posse walk by Ahk. Ahkmenrah frowns at Jed. Cause while his words are full of venom, his eyes hold a mix of jealousy and worry, darting back and forth between Ahk and Octavius’ retreating back.

“Our relationship may be complicated. But at least I’d never leave him broken just because I’m afraid of who I really am.” Ahkmenrah catches Jed’s eye with a stare that challenges him to man up and admit how much he wants Octavius and that his relationship with Amelia is just a cover up. Jed stares at him defiantly for a moment before averting his eyes.

“Are you and Octavius together?” Amelia pipes up from her place beside Jed. Ahkmenrah shifts his eyes over to her and grins.

“Perhaps we are, Perhaps we are not. But really it isn’t anyone’s business but our own.” Ahk tells her. Amelia looks taken aback for a moment.

“No, I suppose not.”She responds, pulling on Jed’s arm. “But if you guys aren’t actually together. You should think about asking him out. I’ve seen you two around school together. You look really cute together.” Ahk doesn’t respond just purses his lips together and watches the two walk away.

He does however, smirk when Jed glances back over his shoulder at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So today it was raining really hard and I went around a curve on an on-ramp for the interstate here. Ending up hitting a puddle at just the right (wrong?) angle and my car went down a ravine. Luckily myself and my car are both ok. But I did think as my car is sliding down 'This is how I die.'
> 
> I'm glad I'm still here to keep bring you all this fic though. I want you all to see how it ends, even though I may not like all of what I have written, I am proud of this piece so far.
> 
> Also remember to drive very carefully in bad weather conditions!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are both picking up and winding down in this story. We are in fact nearing the end. I have it planned out to about 15 chapters in total. But I think it will end up being a bit longer. I'm thinking maybe 20 chapters. So we are about half way through. Maybe a little bit more.

Ahkmenrah sits three rows behind Jed and Amelia at the premiere night of the school’s play. Ahk watches Jed instead of the actors. He notes the way Jed seems bored throughout most of the play; only perking up interest when Octavius is on stage. Ahk is almost glad that Octavius is still giving him the silent treatment. Because if Octavius was talking to him, he would feel the need to tell him all about the way Jed stared at him during the performance. And Ahke definitely doesn’t want to give Octavius hope where there may be none.

Ahkmenrah shifts the bouquet of flowers in his lap. A bouquet he hopes to give to Octavius after the performance, if he will accept it. Amelia also holds a bunch of flowers, idly playing with a petal as she watches the show. The play concludes to thunderous applause and standing ovations. Ahk is thoroughly impressed by the cast members performances Or at least he supposes he would be, if he had paid attention to the play and not Jed. He has been told that this cast of students is quite talented. One of the most talented this school has seen in a few years any way. As the actors file off the stage and out to the school’s main corridor, he hopes that Octavius is no longer angry with him.

Out in the lobby, Ahkmenrah waits patiently for Octavius to finish his conversation with a few other play patrons before approaching him.

“Great job. you were fantastic.” Ahk tells him, pressing the flowers into Octavius’ arms and trying to pull him into a hug. When Octavius stiffens and leans away slightly, Ahk notes that his friend may very wells till be angry with him.

“Listen, I apoligze for what I said the other day.” Ahk begins.

“You told Jed we were dating?” Octavius hisses at him sharply as Ahk drops his arms down to his side.

“I didn’t exactly say we were dating.” Ahk has the courtesy to look somewhat sheepish.

“But you didn’t deny it either, did you?” Octavius accuses shoving the flowers back into Ahkmenrah’s chest. Ahk frowns and places a hand over Octavius’ forcing him to keep a hold of the flowers.

“No. No I didn’t deny it either. I just left it ambigous. But what does it matter? You are not with him. You don’t need to be with him. Not right now. Not at this moment. He is with Amelia and you need to let him go.” Ahk tells him, pulling Octavius’ hand and the flowers away from his chest.

“I thought you weren’t interested in me like that.” Oct whispers resigned to hold Ahkemnrah’s unwelcomed flowers.

“ I don’t. We are not but friends.”

Octavius takes a deep breath in and exhales out through his nose slowly.

“So I can;t date the sophomore girl nor can I date Jed.”

“You don’t even know her name and Jed, he--” Ahk attempts to cut off Octavius, but Oct just holds his free hand up, silencing him.

“You are letting people think we are dating, when you have no interest in me as a boyfriend. Jed may be wrong for me and a date with that girl may indeed have been a nightmare. But you are being a terrible friend. You are keeping me from be able to find someone to love me. Because even if it is isn’t with Jed or with that sophomore, it could be with someone else. But people won’t date me or want to date me if they think I am in a relationship. You say you are doing to this to help me. But how is this helping me? Consider this me breaking up with you. Breaking up with this fake relationship between us. now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go change.” Octavius turns to leave, tears pricking at h eyes. But Ahk’s hands on his shoulders stay him.

“Forgive me, my friend. But I do truly wish to see your happiness and it is not the destructive path you have put yourself on.”

“I’m not ready to forgive you yet.” Oct says cooly, shrugging off Ahk’s hands and walking away. But he keeps Ahk’s flowers hugged to his chest and Ahkmenrah takes that to mean he will be forgiven eventually.

Outside in the parking lot as Ahk slides the key of his host family’s car into the door lock, he can see Jed approaching from behind him through the reflection in the car’s window. He turns to face the cowboy, a smile plastered on his face. Glad that there are plenty of people milling about in the parking lot.

“Hello Jed. great performance, wasn’t it? I daresay, we may have some of those Angelina Jolies and Brad Pitts at our very own school.” Ahk says cheerfully. Jed stops a few paces from Ahk. Ahk watches Jed’s hands clench and unclench. Yes he is very glad for all the adults still in the parking lot. He doesn’t need to be punched by a secretly gay cowboy.

“Where’s Amelia? You guys have been attached at the hips since you started dating. It’s kinda weird to see you without her.” 

“What does he see in you?” Jed asks voice low as he steps closer. Ahk’s smiles widens as he locks eyes with Amelia who is across the parking lot with a few other Sophomores including the girl who had tried to ask out Octavius.

“  
I’m quite offended by the question, Jedediah. I’m very attractive. What doesn’t Octavius see in me?” Ahk says with a bit of mock hurt in his voice. Jed glares at him, crossing his arms over his chest.

“What he sees in me is a future. What he doesn’t see is a fist flying at his face.” Ahk spits a half truth, half lie at Jed.

“I...no, you don’t...I” Jed looks taken about by Ahkmenrah’s statement. Ahk wonders if it is because he just called Jed out on hitting Octavius. Or if it is because he knew about their relationship.

“Look Jed, you can try to deny your whatever it was with Octavius to me all you want. But Octavius has pretty much been my one and only friend these few months I have been in this country and at this school. I know him well enough. He is stupid drunk in love with you.”

“I know.” Jed says in a low voice, stepping even closer to Ahkmenrah. “I know, i know, I know. The damned fool has been in love with me for so long. I thought at first this thing between us was going to be nothing. he’s suck my dick and I’d get off. It wasn’t gay because I wasn’t sucking his dick back. I didn’t have feelings. Then we started having sex and it still wasn’t gay because it was always me putting it in him. And I still didn’t have feelings for him.” Jed pauses scrapping hand through his shaggy hair and turning to look back towards Amelia. “ I can’t be gay, I just can’t. It isn’t right for me to be gay.”

“There is nothing wrong with being gay.” Ahk responds bristling.

“No, I know there isn’t It is just, I can’t be gay. A Smith isn’t gay. My dad, it would crush him, if I was. I can’t let my dad down.” Jed looks lost for a minute. A war within himself brewing behind his eyes.

“Do you love him?” Ahk asks softly. He wants Jed to say no. He wants Jed to sneer and laugh. To have the other football players he is always surrounded by to jump out from behind cars and to beat him up for being a faggy little gay lover. Haha it was all a joke. He doesn’t want Jed to just be some confused teenager. A kid who is only reacting negatively to parental pressure to be a certain way; love a certain way. Ahk thinks that if Jed tells him that he does love Octavius that he will have to forgive him for hurting Octavius.. And if he forgives him, then he will have to help Octavius get Jed back.

“Tell...tell Octavius that I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry for breaking his heart. And just please, treat him right. After everything I’ve done to him, he deserves to be happy. Don’t lead him on like I have.” Jed turns and walks away from Ahk, arms wrapping around Amelia as he comes up behind her. Ahk watches them for a few moments before sliding into the car and heading to his host family’s house. The only thought on his mind is “dammit”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @Crimsonlongsword: I must admit, when I started writing this I only shipped jed and Oct. But after that last chapter and this chapter, I wouldn't be opposed to Ahk/Oct!
> 
> Chockolock: Thank you! I'm glad you liked the chapter. I hope everything continues to live up to your standards! And that when I get to ending you don't feel let down.
> 
> To everyone else that has left me comments on any of the chapters, thank you so much for your support. Even it is just something as simple as how much you love this fic, I love reading everyone's comments. Honestly, comments are what helps to give motivation to write. It lets me know that people do appreciate this and want more. And not just this fic but any writer's fic.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well somehow I have managed to lose my notebook that has my guideline for where this fic is going. I can do it without it. But it may take a bit longer to get the next few chapters as now I have to actually remember where I wanted to go with this fic. I mean, I know where I want it to go. But still frustrating.

Octavius picks at the frayed fabric on the arm of the chair in Sacagawea’s office. Across from him, the guidance councilor, Sacagawea and his history teacher, Theodore Roosevelt sit on a beaten up leather couch. Sacagawea shifts forward, the leather couch creaking as she does so.

“Octavius, I’ve asked you here today because Mr.Roosevelt is very concerned about you.” Sacagawea tells him, her voice the practiced calm of a person who has been a therapist for years. Octavius glares at Roosevelt briefly before returning to pick at his chair.

“Mr.Roosevelt says that your grades have been dropping in his class and that you have been spacing out instead of paying attention like normal.”

“It is nothing. Sorry, don’t worry about it. I was just feeling the stress and pressure of it being my last year here. And the play was also taking a bit out of me. Not to mention all those college applications I have been filling out. So yeah, sorry about my grades. I’ll bring them up, I swear. Play’s over. I have the rest of the semester to fix things.” Octavius rambles. Sacagawea sets her lips into a thin smile and nods patronizingly at Octavius.

“Teddy, if you wouldn’t mind. I think it is best if you left the room.” Sacagawea addresses Roosevelt, placing a hand on his arm and looking over at the history teacher. The two seem to communicate wordlessly through eye contact and eyebrow raises for a bit before roosevelt stands and makes his way out of the guidance office.

“At least talk to her.” Theodore tells Octavius, when he pauses to close the office door. “We do want what is best for you.” Octavius purses his lips together and widens the hole in the arm of the chair. Not making any indication that he is listening. Across from him, Sacagawea sits with a smile still on her face, patiently waiting for him to start speaking. Octavius keeps picking at the chair and she keeps smiling at him.

“Things, really have been stressful lately. I’m sorry. I’ll pay more attention in class.” Octavius says after a few minutes.

“Will you tell me about how you got your black eye?” Sacagawea asks. Octavius fights the urge to touch the mostly healed bruise.

“It isn’t a big deal. Just a bit of miscommunication. I opened my mouth when I shouldn’t have. Totally deserved it.” Oct says, settling back into the chair, an air of unease about him.  
“No one deserves to be hit.” Sacagawea tells him, her smile turning down slightly. Octavius sighs and gives into the urge. Rubbing a finger lightly over a particularly tender spot on the bruise.

“I’m in love. I’m in love and love hurts.” He tells her and her frown deepens.

“If your partner is abusing you…”

“No! He isn’t abusing me! It was one time...or rather it was twice. But we really aren’t anything. We are, were nothing. We are even more nothing now. I just got carried away with the way he made me feel.”

Sacagawea leans forward from the couch, placing a hand lightly on Octavius’ knee. A Serious look on her face.

“There is never a valid excuse for someone to abuse you. It doesn’t matter if it was just one time. Or if it was a thousand times. It also doesn’t matter if the relationship has a foundation of love or just one of pleasure. Abuse is wrong.”

Octavius shifts in his chair, knocking the guidance councilor’s hand off his knee. She gives him a tight smile, sitting back into the couch once again, hand reaching to pick up a clipboard from a table beside the couch. Eyes scanning the words written on some of the pages quickly.

“I hear you and Ahkmenrah have grown rather close since he started his exchange program. I’ve heard that you two have been exceptionally close these last couple weeks.”

“Ahkmenrah has not and would never lay a hand on me.” Octavius defends his friend. Even if he isn’t currently on speaking terms with him. He can’t stand the thought of anyone thinking badly of the Egyptian.

“I know it wasn’t Ahkmenrah who gave you the black eye, Octavius. I may just be the guidance counselor, but I do know my students.”

Octavius raises an eyebrow at her, a look of disbelief on his face. She laughs at him.

“Ok fine. this school is really small and not only do the students like to gossip. But so does the faculty.” She admits. “But I am also very observant.”

Octavius can’t argue with her. It is true that this school is small. The high school of a small farming community. They boast a total of 815 students. Ranging from 7th graders to 12th grade. He will in the spring graduate with only 100 other people. A small class even by the school’s low population standards. And the one thing he has come to know about this small farm community is that there is nothing else to do but get drunk, have sex and gossip.

He, himself had even spread or at least fanned the flames of gossip a few times. Still, it was different when he was the subject of the gossip.

“So tell me about your relationship with Jedediah and how it took this calamitous turn.” Sacagawea asks him, clipboard having been replaced with a pen and a pad of paper. Octavius wonders if his relationship with Jed had ever really been a secret. Or if they had only been just fooling themselves. Octavius slouches down in the chair. Eyes looking up at the ceiling. He supposes he did need to talk about this. Ahk was right, he was going to destroy himself. 

“I hated him at first. “ he begins. “Hated everything about him.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was thinking of making this chapter longer, with a flashback on how our two boys started their little tryst. But instead i decided to keep it to myself for now. And maybe do a prequel one shot after I finish this fic.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Next month is Camp Nanowrimo. Anyone else participating? I would like to have this done before then, but I know that won't happen. However, I am going to try to get out as many chapters before July so I can focus on my Nanowrimo story instead that month. So expect no updates for this in July.

His meeting with Sacagawea ended up taking up the rest of the school day. He had been released finally with a few numbers to different psychiatrists and a promise that she would be there whenever he needed her. He felt, lighter, freer. Like a huge weight had been lifted off of him. He wasn’t fully ready to move on from Jed yet, but he felt like he had finally stepped on the path to moving on.

Even though the school day was over and he no longer had to stay for play practice, he had no desire to rush home. Instead, he found himself wandering the halls of his tiny school, eventually making his way outside and over to where the football players were practicing. Octavius climbs to the top of the bleachers. The metal of the bleacher seats warm under the early fall sun. Scattered throughout the bleachers, other students are loitering about. Some watching the school’s football team practice, others just hanging out with their friends. Octavius can remember a time a couple years ago when the students would have been chased off by the security guards. The older men who had been with the school seemingly forever. They had been an alright bunch, if not a bit uptight and grumpy. They didn’t like to see students milling about after school. Figured it would lead to delinquency and all that. They ran a tight ship. But then two years ago budget cuts led them being forced into retirement and the school replaced the three of them with one middle aged guard.

Not that Octavius didn’t like Larry. But the school really didn’t need any type of security guard. Fights were a rare occurrence and were over just as quickly as they started. And most of the students were smart enough to keep the drug deals out of the school. There was a hierarchy to the way things were done here. You met up with the town’s only meth head’s son to buy crack out in the back 40. If you did the drug deal at school, you had to acknowledge their existence. But if you did it on the weekend out where only the cows would see, you could go on pretending that you were better than them come Monday at school. Not that Octavius would know anything about that. Just rumors and the occasional cheerleader way too peppy for her own good.

A throat clearing snaps his attention back to the present and he finds himself staring up at Amelia, mouth suddenly dry as cotton.

“Hey” She says hands hooked around the straps of her backpack. “Can I sit with you?” He thinks about telling her no. He really does. He isn’t sure if he is ready for this step in his journey quite yet. Although is one ever ready to have a sit-down with one’s ex lover’s new lover? He nods and slides his own backpack off the bench, making room for her to sit. She smiles at him and settles herself now next to him. For a few minutes neither one of the speaks. Amelia’s eyes are focused forward, following Jed’s movements on the field as he practices alongside his teammates. Octavius is torn between staring awkwardly at Amelia and watching Jed himself. He settles for just staring down as his hands gripping his knees in a white knuckled nervous grip.  
“I’m breaking things off with Jed.” Amelia says finally, eves never moving from Jed’s form running across the field. Octavius turns to actually stare opened mouth at her this time. Confusion clearly written over his face.

“Now, now. Stop trying to convince me that we are perfect together. My mind's made up.” She tells him teasingly.

“Sorry I just..why?” He asks, head ducking down to cover his… He isn’t sure what. Embarrassment? At being caught not upset over this? Perhaps joy? Does Amelia know about him and Jed? Sacagawea knew, Ahkmenrah knew and he suspects that Roosevelt knows too. So it might be safe to assume that Amelia knows about what Jed and he used to be. Amelia laughs at him, a soft tinkling melody before sighing deeply.

“I’ve been dating Jed for a little over a month now.” She says softly in a whisper so low that Octavius feels the need to lean in close to hear. He thinks about how Jed and him while never officially together, stopped the whatever it was between them just over a month ago.

“41 days.” He says out loud without meaning too, not noticing the look Amelia shoots at him.

“Yes and in all that time not a day goes by that Jed somehow doesn’t turn the conversation towards you.” She swallows thickly and Octavius wonders if she is going to cry. Wonders what he will do if she does cry.

“At first I thought that you two must have been friends. But you never hung out with each other. So I thought maybe you two had had a falling out. His voice was always so sad and yet so full of longing when he talked about you. Always about how smart you were or what you did in class. Yet whenever we would hang out with my friends and with his other friends, he never brought you up. In fact, it was almost like he avoided the topic of you like the plague. I thought maybe you two had been friends in grade school and just had bad blood between the two of you.” 

Octavius snorts at her statement and sneak her another look. She still stares ahead, still watching Jed.

“I know a month is not a very long time. But Jed is so stupid in love with you. I think I realized that within our first week of dating. I just didn’t want to believe it. Jed’s my first real boyfriend. I wanted him to be in love with me. I think, maybe eventually Jed would have loved me. Or at least learn to pretend to love me. But then you had to go and start dating Ahkmenrah and I knew I had lost him.”

Octavius opens his mouth to argue with her. To tell her that Jed doesn’t love him, never has and never will. Jed has made that perfectly clear. He also wants to argue that he has never dated Ahkmenrah, but that is just a small after thought. She holds up a hand though, silencing him.

“Please let me finish.” She tells him. Jed doesn’t know he is in love with you. Jed can’t come to terms with the fact that he could possibly like boys. He was so jealous of Ahkmenrah. If this had been the Old West, I’m sure Jed would have challenged Ahk to a showdown at high noon. He even confronted Ahk after the play on opening night. I don’t know what he said to Ahk, but I’m sure it was something about Ahk not deserving you and your honor.” She slouches forward then, pressing her chest down against the top of her thighs, arms wrapping around the back of them. “I’d have given anything to have Jed look at me with the same look he has in his eyes when he talks about you.”

Octavius still wonders what to do if she cries. Wonders, if he should pre-emptively comfort her. A hand on the shoulder, maybe?

“Why are you telling me this?” he settles for asking instead. She sits back up and presses her face in close to him.

“You and Ahkmenrah do make a cute couple.” She muses, breath washing hot over Octavius’ face. “I don’t know what went on between you and Jed. But I’m not stupid enough to think there was never anything not between the two of you. Jed is way too broken up over it and you for it to have been nothing. I guess, I just wanted to give you my blessing. To tell you, that I will hold no grudges against you if things don’t work out between you and Ahkmenrah and you decide to chase Jed.” She stands, grabbing her backpack and starts to make her way down the bleachers. Three steps down, she stops and turns back to Octavius.

“Next Saturday is his rodeo tournament. I’m sure he’d love for you to go cheer him on.” She shouts up before bounding the rest of the way down and off towards the student parking lot. Octavius looks back over to the football field in time to catch Jed staring up at him. His heart catches in his throat.

“Jed doesn’t realize how much he loves you.” Amelia’s words haunt him. It seems even when he is ready to let go of Jed. Jed won’t just quit him.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this was a difficult chapter to write. I feel like this is one of the most important chapters in this story and wanted to get it just right. There are parts that I absolutely love in this chapter. And parts I hate. Either way, I hope you all enjoy this installment.
> 
> My next update probably won't be until August, as I do need to concentrate on my Camp Nanowrimo project.

Octavius isn’t sure when Amelia breaks things off with Jed. There is no big fight. Not that he was expecting on to happen. But he is surprised that Jed didn’t make a scene in front of the school. For as much as that boy likes to make fun of the theater kids, he sure could be dramatic when he wanted to be.

But there is no big dramatic scene in the cafeteria. No Jed on his knees begging Amelia to stay. Instead it is just one day Amelia and her friends are sitting with Jed and his friends and the next day the two groups are across the lunch room.. Octavius is almost disappointed by it. He did kinda want a show of it. Small town living means sometimes the only bit of excitement is a breakup, after all.

And ok, his focus on their break up and the lack of public drama ensuing from it is because he is a coward. Too afraid to make a move just yet. He thinks that if there had been a bit of animosity between the two that Jed might have turned to him for a bit a comfort. And he isn’t proud, but he would have let Jed take comfort in him. But just that one time. He has yet to see a therapist, but he has talked to Sacagawea a few times since the initial visit and he has realized that he needs to find himself first and worry about relationships later. He can so do that. He just has to not look at Jed ever. Or at least until Jed is on his knees begging Octavius to be with him.

“Are you going to the rodeo on Saturday?” Ahk ask him, a carrot stick poised partially to his mouth. The corner of Octavius’ mouth turns down and he shakes his head.

“I don’t think it is a good idea. I’m taking your advice and moving on. I don’t need to bring myself into temptation. And Jed on a horse in a cowboy hat is a temptation, I cannot resist.” Octavius tells him as he spears a pear chunk with his fork. Bringing it to his mouth and chewing slowly. Ahkmenrah raises an eyebrow at Octavius as he crunches on his carrot stick.

“Besides did you not just a few weeks ago tell me Jed was a bad idea and that by pursuing him I was on the path of self destruction?” Octavius asks, shoulders raising in a slight shrug. Ahkmenrah looks properly chastised at Octavius’ words.

“I may, in fact, at times be a terrible judge of character. I will maintain that at the time, you would have had better luck stepping in front of a train.”

“Now thought?”

“Now I’m still sure there will be times you hurt. But I think - in the end - the happiness in your heart and the love his denies for you will make the pain worth it.”

Octavius turns slightly to look at Jed, watching as he laughs with his friends at his lunch table.

“I wonder.” Octavius says.

 

************************************************************

The Biggest Little Rodeo, the sign above the gate boasts. A ghost of a smile graces Octavius’ face as he pays his admission and allows himself to be pulled along with the crowd into the fairgrounds. It has been years since the last he came here. It was something his parents had delighted in dragging him to when he was younger. But he hadn’t been fond of watching the cowboys wrestle calves to the ground or flail about on the bulls. Back then the sights and sounds had reminded him of Jedediah. Back then he had loathed Jedediah. Hated the way jed would chase him on the playground just to pants him. Then point and laugh at his tightie whities. Back then Octavius couldn’t focus on the rodeo. His attention on Jed, who would perch on top of the corral fence by the bull pen’s gate. Jed’s father on a heavy bull waiting for the gate to release them. Jed smiling encouragingly at his dad. But even from a distance and with Jed’s face half obscured from the shadows his little cowboy hat cast, Octavius could see the fear in his eyes. Bull riding was a dangerous sport. Then the gates would open and the large angry animal would burst forth, Jed’s father clinging on. And Octavius would hold his breath, a mix of wanting Jed’s father to come out unscathed and for him be hurt warring in his young mind. Then his own father would arrive with lemonade shakeups and funnel cakes in hand. Octavius would munch on his snack, sneaking guilty looks towards where Jed was now sitting perched on his dad’s shoulders, the bull riding a success. Octavius wouldn’t know it then, with Jed bullying him but those were the first seeds of desire for the cowboy planting themselves in him.

The grew from playground bully and bullied to awkward gangly junior high students. Jed had given up on bullying Octavius somewhere along the way and those seeds of desire had blossomed into a full on crush for Octavius. Everything Jed did sent shivers running through Octavius’ body. His too loud laugh in class, when he and his friends thought they were being clever. To the way, he sauntered down the hallways between classes like he owned the school. And owned he did, he was by far one of the most popular students in that junior high wing of the school.

And Octavius had become invisible. The nerdy theater kid, who was scrawny and too smart for his own good. Now 13, he struggled between being glad Jed no longer pushed him face down in the dirt to really wanting Jed to do just that. At 13, one’s hormones are completely illogical and out of control. And at 13, Jed was beginning to fill out quite nicely, which did nothing to quell the burning crush Octavius had on him. 13 was also the first year, Octavius had refused to go to the rodeo. 13 was when Octavius had started messing around with Jedediah.

The smells of the fair- funnel cake sweetness mixed with the sour stench of cow manure- did little to curb Octavius’ nerves. He felt like everyone was watching him; judging him. That everyone knew he was here with the intention of wooing Jed. No, wrong, he scolded himself. He wasn’t exactly here to woo Jed. He was here just to watch him. To lend him support as perhaps a friend and classmate would. He wasn’t the one that needed to do the wooing. He needed to wait for Jed to make the first move.

He slides into the stands surrounding the rodeo corral, putting himself near enough to the front of them to have a good view, but far enough away that Jed wouldn’t immediately spot him if he were to glance over to them. Briefly he wished he would have asked Ahkmenrah to come with him, but no. He needed to do this by himself.

As the rodeo announcer called out for the barrel racing event to begin, Octavius lets his mind wander. Making up scenarios where Jed catches his eye mid-turn round a barrel. Time would slow down like a John Hughes movie. Jed would bring his horse up to the fence and then in one blink of an eye and the next, be off his horse and over the fence. Making his way to Octavius while declaring his love to him. Octavius chuckles to himself, feeling his face light up with inner-embarrassment at such a thought. Ridiculous, he tells himself and turns his attention back to the cowboys running their horses around the barrels.

Despite growing up in a farming community, where a good chunk of the population is into rodeo sports riding. Be it professionally or as a hobby, Octavius knows very little about any of the events typically seen in a rodeo. He does somewhat know barrel racing though. Jed was not into sweet talking during their fuck sessions. Jed was into sports talk. Especially talk surrounding the rodeo, his one true love. So Octavius knew that the faster one went around the barrels, the better. He knew that barrel racing was generally considered a women’s sport in the professional arenas. But as Jed was only 17 and an amateur, it was acceptable and not unheard of for him to run the barrels. 

Octavius looked over to the entry gate. Beside Jed stoop Roosevelt, one hand on Jed’s horse’s neck. The mare dug her hoof at the ground. Mouth straining against the bit. Jed watched his competition snaking around the barrels with eyes narrowed to slits, his jaw set into a hardline. Teddy’s mouth moved, probably to give out some last minute advice.Perhaps even pointing out what the competing racer was doing right and wrong. After the racer left the arena and Jed lined up for his turn, Octavius could feel himself holding his breath. He wanted Jed to win this.

Jed doesn’t win. Jed doesn't’ even come close to winning. RIght before Jed is out the gate, his eyes find Octavius’ and he hesitates. Octavius watches, desperately screaming with the rest of the crowd for Jed to go, as a swirl of emotions slide over Jed’s face. Jed’s hesitation only last mere moments. But in a timed run, those few seconds are everything.

If Octavius had been paying attention to the other racers, he would know that Jed will end up in the bottom three. But he doesn’t remember anyone else’s times from before Jed’s run. At the gate, Jed swings angrily down from his mount, throws the reins to Teddy and stomps off. Octavius doesn’t run after him. Instead he sits and watches as the last two barrel riders run their clover leaf patterns before finding the courage to go find Jed. Knowing without a doubt that he is the reason for Jed’s bad run.

He finds Jed kicking the hell out of a tire on a blue horse trailer that is parked a few meters from the rodeo corral, tucked in with several other trailers.

“I hope that is your trailer.” Octavius says as he steps up behind Jed. Jed whirls around, eyes wild and Octavius takes half a step backwards, hands coming up to protect his face; worried that Jed might hit him. Instead Jed makes a strangled sort of noise and whirls back around, leaning forward to rest his head against the side of the trailer.

“Why are you here?” Jed asks, words muffled by the blue painted steel of the trailer.

“Well you know me. Love myself some good ole rodeo action.” Octavius says with a smirk and shoves his hands into his pants pockets. He wants to reach out and grasp Jed’s shoulder. But he is going to wait for Jed to make the first move.

“You hate the rodeo.” Jed tells him, pushing away from the trailer, but not turning around to face Octavius. “You haven’t been to one of these since Junior High.” 

“Fine, I happen to just like looking at the cowboys.” Octavius snorts and then just sort of freezes, Jed’s words sinking in.

“Wait, how did you know that I haven’t been to one of these since Junior High?”

Jed doesn’t answer, just shrugs his shoulders. 

“Have...did you look for me?” Octavius whispers, his mind flying all over the place with the possibility of what it could mean that Jed noticed his absence at this event.

“Everyone and their grandma comes to this thing. It is the biggest event of the year in our podunk town. I just thought it was weird that you didn’t come is all.” Jed -back still facing him- says. Octavius grins and closes the gap between them. Arms sliding around Jed’s middle and chin coming to rest on his left shoulder.

“I want to be with you.” Octavius says softly. “I want to have a picket fence with you.”

Jed stiffens, but Octavius refuses to step away.

“Oct, I can’t. I just can’t, ok?”

“Amelia broke up with you because she could see how goddamned in love with me you were. Mr. Roosevelt held a fucking intervention with Sacagawea because he knew something was going on between us and was worried it wasn’t healthy. Fucking Larry caught us hot and heavy in the locker room and then tried to give me dating advice when you ran off. Don’t fucking tell me you don’t want us to be us. I can’t take it anymore. Everyone else and everything be damned. We...we could be real.”

Jed turns then and kisses Octavius long and hard. Tongue pressing into Octavius’ mouth and tasting him like a man dying of hunger. His nails dig half moon indents into Octavius’ shoulders where they grip him. Too soon for Octavius’ liking Jed pulls away, breathing heavily through his nose. Octavius leans in for another kiss. But Jed stops him with a finger to his lips.

“I want this Oct. I want us to be a real thing. I want the picket fence thing with you too, whatever the hell that means. But I just can’t. I’m no good for you. Roosevelt is right, whatever we have isn’t healthy. I won’t ever be able to just say fuck everyone else and be with you in public like. You deserve something more than me. Someone better than me. Someone who isn’t going to turn tail and run anytime someone gets a whiff of what we are to each other.” Jed pushes Octavius away from him gently and stares down at his dusty boot, clearing his throat a few times.

“I better..uh..better go see where Roosevelt is with my horse. He is taking a long time to bring her back here and I need to brush her down.” Jed steps forward, hand out like he is going to place it on Octavius, then thinks better of it and quickly drops his hand. Striding away, back towards the corral and leaving Octavius once again broken hearted.

“Damn.” Octavius whispers to hims. He walks over and leans back against Jed’s horse trailer, suddenly unable to breathe. “Damn. Damn. Damn.” He places his head between his knees and tries to breathe.

A few minutes pass and he finds the gravel under his feet to be very interesting. He looks up only when he hears footsteps crunching in the gravel towards him. 

“Napoleon, Ivan, Capone.” He greets the three men walking towards him “Long time no see.” Octavius straightens up as they come closer. Classmates three years his senior.

“Fucking Faggot.” Capone says, spitting a wad of chew at Octavius. Octavius blinks, he has been called worse.

“Right, well..uh..nice seeing you all again. I got to go now though.” He makes to step past them. But Capone is grabbing him roughly by the throat and throwing him to the ground. The air is knocked out of him and he groans, rolling to his side in pain. Ivan, kicks him in the ribs, hard.

“Stay the fuck away from Jedediah.” Ivan grows. “He ain’t no fucking faggot. He ain’t ever going to be no fucking faggot either, got it. So keep your fucking pansy ass hands off him.”

Because Octavius has no self preservation skills and is in fact a walking bad idea, he struggles to sit up and leer at them. 

 

“I dunno guys, Jed seemed to like fucking faggots when he was calling my name while balls deep in my ass.”

Everything is black after that. Before the words had barely even finished leaving his mouth, Napoleon grabs him by the face and slams his head backwards down into the gravel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jed is probably never going to get his shit together. I'm a terrible person and just keep torturing poor Oct. Also I really like the cafeteria and that is probably why I feature it in almost every chapter.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well my friends, it is time for another update. Chapter 15 is in the works and may in fact be the last chapter. (I might try pushing it to 16, but that will depend on how 15 goes.) 
> 
> I apologize in advance if I have anything wrong in medical terminology or things related to what happens in this chapter. I did just the briefest of research on comas and Egyptian laws. I was hoping this chapter would be longer, but I am overall pleased with how it turned out.
> 
> And in case anyone was wondering. No I didn't reach my Camp Nanowrimo goal. I started off strong, doubling my expectant word goal for the first few days and then realized that I would need to do a lot of research into my topic in order to continue it. So it is currently on the back burner until such time that I have to do it properly.

When Octavius awakens, his eyes are heavy. He can only open them to let just a fraction of light filter in. His mouth feels like he swallowed the Sahara Desert, but when he goes to swallow he finds he cannot. It is a strange feeling, he feels like he should be choking against whatever is in his throat. He tries to lift his hand up to remove whatever it is in his throat, only to find himself restrained. He would scream, only he can’t get his voice around whatever is blocking his throat. Distantly he hears some frantic beeping then footsteps rushing in and shouting. Then there is a sharp prick in his arm and he sleeps again.

The second time Octavius awakens, he doesn’t even bother to open his eyes. Everything hurts. Even the hairs on his arms are screaming at him He can still feel the obstruction in his throat, but that is nothing compared to the pain that is wracking the rest of his body. He tries shifting himself into a more comfortable position, but he is still restrained. 

A hand reaches up and gently cups the side of his face. A voice speaks to him, but he can’t understand the words through the fog in his head. He thinks perhaps it is Jed. But the hands are much too soft and the voice doesn’t have the right drawl to it. But he likes the thought of Jed here beside him, so he hangs on to that as he slips into unconsciousness again.

When he awakes for the third time, the pain has subsided into a dull throbbing ache. He can open his eyes, even if it is with extreme effort. He can turn his head a little, but the tube in his throat makes too much head movement difficult. Next to his bed Ahkmenrah sits in a chair playing bejeweled blitz on a tablet.

“Morning, sunshine.” Ahk says not looking up from his tablet. Octavius blinks in response and pulls at his restraints. 

“Ah, those are to keep you from pulling out that tube in your throat. Despite what movies would have you to believe, it is bad business to just go yanking those things out.” Ahkmenrah slides the tablet into a bag near his feet and turns to look at Octavius. Tears shining brightly in his eyes.

“I thought...I thought a few times, I wasn’t going to get to finish out my exchange program with you.”

Octavius doesn’t respond. He can’t; not with the stupid tube down his trachea. Ahkmenrah sighs and leans forward as if he means to kiss Octavius on the forehead. Octavius watches him, eyes blinking owlishly up at his friends. Several moments pass before Ahkmenrah sits back into his chair. Nothing more having passed between them but the air of tension.

“At any rate, I’m glad you finally woke up. Hopefully you;ll be back in school soon.”  
****************************************************************************************************

It turns out it takes a lot of time to heal from being beaten to a bloody pulp. Lots of people come to visit him from school. Ahkmenrah is there practically every day. Sacagawea and Mr.Roosevelt stop by a few times each week. Wea mostly to make sure he is keeping up on his school work (delivered to him each day by Ahk) and Teddy apologizes endlessly to him for not having gotten there sooner. It is tiresome, Octavius knows that if it hadn’t of been then, it would have another time. This town isn’t exactly known for being the most tolerant place. And really Octavius is kinda glad it was then and not later when no one would have found him. He is aware of how close he was to dying.

Larry and his son stop by a few times. Larry offering sev eral times to teach Octavius self defense, while Nick sits in the background with headphones on. Laa (who looks suspiciously like Larry’s illegitimate child) and Tilly, both of whom he has only spoken to a handful of times, came to see him once or twice. Even Amelia dropped by to see him at least once.

In fact, so many people came to visit him. Bringing him get well cards, wishes, balloons and flowers. But not once did Jed come. Not even to stand awkwardly outside his room for a few minutes before rushing off with a made up excuse to be somewhere else.

He is unable to ask after Jed the first couple weeks. Then after his tube is removes, his throat is raw and sore and he only talks when people asks him questions. After his throat has healed and he can talk in short sentences, it seems pointless to ask about him anymore.

 

“He just isn’t the person I had thought he was.” Ahk says after catching Octavius staring longingly at the entryway to his hospital room. Octavius turns to look at him with an eyebrow raised.

“I don’t..” He trails off because he knows what or rather who Ahkmenrah is referring to.

“Well he is actually what I thought he was. Which is a no good coward. But when we had talked that night after your play. I had thought he had changed. I was wrong, he wasn’t willing to stay by you and help you fight through this.” Ahk’s rant ends with a shout. Chest heaving in anger.

Octavius carefully folds his hands in his lap and stares down at them.

“It isn’t easy being open about being gay.” Octavius whispers. He can’t fault Jed for wishing to keep pretending to be straight. He knows first hand how much safer it is to be straight.

“You don’t think I don’t know that?” Ahk reels on him, words loud and angry. “In my country homosexuality is still illegal. Men like me can get up to 17 years in jail. 17 years just for being in love with another man. So yes I know what it is to feel afraid to be myself.”

“Yes because being open here is just puppies and fucking rainbows.” Octavius spits out nastily, ignoring the loud beeping of his heart monitor. “Or did you forget that I was beaten to a bloody fucking pulp recently?!”

Ahkmenrah isn’t given a chance to answer before the on duty nurse comes running in. She stops at the foot of Octavius’ bed with a scowl on her face.

“Boys, need I remind you that Octavius is still hooked up to a heart monitor. Do not rile him up. It worries us when the heart rate suddenly spikes. And I am too old to be running in here every few minutes due to his monitor going crazy over a little lover’s quarrel.” She gives them suffering both one long suffering look before turning sharply on her heels and marching out the door.

“Look, I’m sorry.” Ahk whispers, standing and coming to sit perched on the edge of his bed; by his right hip. “This is my fault. You being in here. If I had just stuck with my original judgements...If I hadn’t told you to…” Octavius hushes his friend, lacing their fingers together.

“Listen Ahk, you are not to blame. No one but that homophobic bastards who did this to me are to blame. Jed...Jed isn’t necessarily a coward. Not because he can’t be open about his relationship with me. And not because he can’t even be bothered to come visit me. And it fucking hurts that he hasn’t come to see me. Hurts more than any of the broken bones and bruises those guys inflicted on me. But I can’t make him come out of the closet. It isn’t right. Besides, he had made his choice about us before I was attacked. And as much as I would love a life to be like a stupid romantic movie, it isn’t. I can’t expect a brush with death to change his mind.” Octavius stops speaks as a lump forms in his throat and he can no longer speak around it. Ahkmenrah leans forward, resting his forehead against Octavius. The hand not intertwined with Octavius’ comes up to wrap around the back of Oct’s neck, thumb rubbing circles in his skin.

“Well then, he is quite stupid.” Ahkmenrah’s breath is warm against Octavius’ lips. Octavius wonders when his friend had fallen for him.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this was an extremely hard chapter to write. I meant to have it finished and uploaded by the end of September. But I wasn't ready to finish this story. I wasn't ready to let it go. Then October came around and I signed up for a Spoopy Halloween fic exchange on here and since that had a due date I needed to focus on that. October also signaled the start of filming for an indie film I am in. So I found myself too busy to do any writing on this fic. But it is now November, my Halloween fic is long done, filming is almost wrapped and play practice is about to start. So I sat myself down one of my few free days and forced myself to finish this.
> 
> This is the end. I'm divided on this chapter, there are some parts I really love and others that I don't care for. It is done though and I will miss it.

Time passes as time often does. Octavius heals, he goes home and he goes back to school. Jed doesn’t exactly avoid him but he also doesn’t seek him out. Octavius heals but only physically.

Fall slowly turns into winter as Octavius’ bruises fade and his bones mend. As christmas break nears, Octavius is certain that Ahkmenrah loves him and he wonders if he could ever love Ahk back. He thinks perhaps Jed has ruined him for others. He is almost certain he will never love any other than Jed.

Ahkmenrah doesn’t make a move one way or another. Of which Octavius is both irritated by and thankful for. He doesn’t want to hurt their friendship by having to turn down Ahk, yet he isn’t entirely sure if he would turn him down. Maybe it is because he is lonely. Maybe it is because he just wants someone to love him. Or maybe it is because in the short time he has known the foreign exchange student, Ahk has stood by him.

But Ahkmenrah still doesn’t ask him out and Christmas break passes. Winter gives way to spring and Oct’s attack becomes nothing more than a nightmare that keeps him from sleeping sometimes. Octavius surprises even himself when he asks Ahkmenrah to be his date to prom. He tells himself it is just as friends. He isn’t sure if that is true though. He is still holding out hope for Jed even if there is no hope to be holding.

Prom night is a mostly perfect affair. Ahk is downright breath-taking in his tuxedo. Octavius thinks that if he had known, had grown up with Ahk instead of Jed he would be in love with the Egyptian instead. Ahk pays for everything despite the fact that it was Octavius who had asked Ahk to the dance. Ahk just tells him he is glad his friend is alive to enjoy their prom together. They spend most of their prom sitting at the tables. Empty stacks of snack plates and cups of soda littering the table top.

“I’m not a dancer. I’ll just step on your toes.” Octavius swears each time Ahkmenrah tries to get him to dance. But then Jed is named Prom King and kisses the Prom Queen - Tilly- hard on the mouth until she pushes him away with a giggling reminder that she is dating Laa. Jed just laughs and stumbles way, a couple of teachers frowning at him.

“He’s drunk.” Ahk stage whispers to Oct. Oct doesn’t answer just shoves a handful of pretzels into his mouth and watches Jed obnoxiously try to hit on the underclassman date of one of his friends. Ahk sighs but doesn’t say anything further. Instead he grabs Oct’s hand, pulling him out of his chair and towards the dance floor as a slow song comes on.

Octavius allows himself to be pulled close to Ahk. Let’s Ahk rest his left hand on his hip. Let’s him bring their hands up to chest level.

“I’m stupid. He’s stupid. It’s stupid.” Octavius mumbles. Ahk hums in agreement and presses his cheek against Octavius’. Octavius sighs and closes his eyes, losing himself to the music and the gentle sway of their bodies. As the song fades and the intro to the next one begins to play, Oct opens his eyes and searches Ahkmenrah’s.

“I…” he startes and stops, licking his lips and swallowing.

“Oh screw it!” he exclaims and surges down the inch difference in their height to capture Ahk’s lips with his own. For a moment or two there is nothing but the whooshing sound of blood rushing through his ears and the feel of Ahk’s fingers pressing bruises into his hip. then there is a crash, some cursing and the shattering of glass.

Octavius tears himself away from Ahkmenrah and turns towards the snack area. Jed stares at the both of them. Mouth hung open in shock or anger or jealousy, Octavius can’t tell. One of the snack tables turned over on its side. Punch bowl laying in a mess of broken glass and sticky liquid on the floor. Mr.Khan pushes his way through the crowd of students to grab Jed roughly by the arm. Jed just shakes him off and stalks out of the community center. For a long time no one moves. everyone staring at the door jed had stormed out in disbelief. then the DJ cracks a joke about how some people just can’t handle the pressure and responsibility of being royalty and just like that the party was back on. Or at least it was for everyone but Octavius and Ahkmenrah.

Octavius breaks away from Ahk to run out the door after Jed. But Jed is long gone, his tail lights nothing but a distant glow.

“I should be offended that my date just ran out after another man right after kissing me.” Ahk teases as he comes up beside Octavius.

Any apologies he might have given just die in his throat. So he just shakes his head and stares off in the direction that Jed had driven. Ahk takes his hand and squeezes it once.

“C’mon. I’ll take you home.” He says quietly and starts to walk towards where the limo is parked. the driver no doubt napping while waiting for the dance to end. But Oct’s hand on his bicep stays him and as he turns to face his friend, Octavius surprises him a second time that night by pressing his lips against his once again.

This kiss is not like the first kiss. where that kiss was slow and soft, this kiss is hungry. this kiss is desperate. Octavius tongue teases and begs for entrance to Ahk’s mouth. And Ahk obliges the request, parting his lips to Octavius’ tongue. His arms wind around Oct’s neck and pull their bodies together. They break for air, foreheads resting together and noses just barely touching.

“I feel nothing.” Ahk says with a low chuckle. “I want to. Gods, I so desperately want to feel a spark. You are a great friend, a great man. I thought I wanted you. I still kinda want you. But there is nothing.” Octavius laughs, his breath washing hot over Ahk’s face.

“No, no, my friend.” Octavius says, pressing his nose lightly against Ahk’s. His lips just brushing Ahk’s lips. “Don’t apologize. You are wonderful. I wanted to want you too. I wanted to be free of Jed. Octavius pulls away from Ahk, a grin plastered on his face.

“Yes let’s leave this place. But not to go home. Oh no, the night is young. There is but a few weeks to graduation and just a few more before you return to Egypt. We have the limo for a handful more hours tonight, let’s go celebrate our youth!”

 

Octavius smiles as he hands back the yearbook he just signed. He adjusts his purple robe and waves at Ahkmenrah whos is currently engaged in conversation with Mr.Roosevelt just a few feet away. He adores Ahkemenrah and even loves him. He doesn’t regret kissing him prom night. Those kisses were a step forward in their relationship. Even if those kisses didn’t go in the direction either one of them expected, Octavius knew that kissing Ahk had been the right choice. their friendship was stronger now. Ahk excuses himself from roosevet picking his way over to Octavius through the crowd.

“Congratulations my friend!” Octavius says as he pulls Ahkmenrah in for a hug. Ahk wraps his arms around Octavius and rest his chin on Oct’s shoulder.

“Promise me that you will email me every day and skype at least once a week.” Ahk says after they both pull away.

“As soon as I am done with basic training, I’ll email you several times a day. And I’ll write you letters whenever I can. I promise I will stay in contact with you.” Octavius replies clapping a hand on Ahk’s shoulder. Ahk smiles and reaches up to grip Oct’s hand.

“Are you sure you want to join the military? I’m sure there are..”

“Ah, excuse me.” Jed’s voice calls out from behind Octavius, cutting out Ahkmenrah. Octavius’ smile slides off his face and he has to force himself to keep his breathing steady as he turns to face Jed, hand falling away from Ahk’s shoulder.

“Hey” He says looking at the floor instead of Jed. Ahk places a hand at the small of his back and steps up closer to him. His body heat comforting.

In all honesty, as much as he loves Jed, he has avoided him since Prom night. Kissing Ahkmenrah certainly wasn’t cheating and it isn’t like he is ashamed of what he did. But there is just so much...too much between him and Jed and with graduation he just feels like their chapter is ending. And he doesn’t know if he can close the book of their relationship or if he wants to even if he needs to. He takes a deep breath and looks up into Jed’s eyes.

“Hello Jedediah. Congratulations.” He says this time.

“Howdy, congrats back to you.” Jed says, “Both of you.” Silence falls over the three of them as an awkward moments passes.

“Can I talk to -”

“What are you going to d-”

They both stop talking and laugh slightly.

“Sorry, you go first.” Jed says shoving his hands in to his pockets, his graduation gown unzipped and flung open.

“I was just wondering what your plans were. You know now that schools over.”

“Oh, I’m heading out West. I’ve got a full ride on a Rodeo scholarship for college.” Jed shrugs his shoulders as if it is no big deal, fiddling with the sleeve hem of his graduation robes. “What about you?”

“I’m joining the army actually.” Octavius laughs as Ahkmenrah huffs beside him. “I could use some discipline in my life. And it would give me an excuse to travel.”

“I’m going back to Egypt.” Ahk pipes up.Jed’s lips quirk into a small smile.

“When ya get back there, can you send me one of them bricks from those pyramid y’all have there?”

“I’ll see what I can do.” Ahk laughs.

“Any, I came over here to see if Octavius wouldn’t mind talking to me. Alone.”

“I’ll catch up to you later, Ahk. Pizza at Harris’?” He asks as he steps up to Jed.

“As long as we can get the ‘German’” Ahk responds.

“Gross, no! I’ve told you before sauerkraut does not on a pizza go. We will get good old sausage.”  
“As long as you are paying!” Ahk shouts as Octavius and Jed walk away.

Their legs carry them out the school and around back to the football field and halfway up the bleachers. Jed straddles the bench while Octavius leans back against them.

“What did you want to talk about?” Oct asks staring up into the afternoon sun. Jed sighs but doesn’t answer right away. Octavius glances over at him. His eyes are closed and his nose is scrunched a little like he is thinking about what to say.

“Now, I know I have no right to ask this of you. Hell I have absolutely no right to ask anything of you.” Jed begins softly, eyes staying closed. Hands clenching on his jeans. “But I was wondering if you could forgive me. I know, I did a lot of damage to you. So many unforgivable things. And there is no excuse for any of them.” Jed pauses and opens his eyes to stare at Octavius pleadingly.

“I want so badly to ask you for a second chance. When...when you were hurt so many things flooded through me. I couldn’t stand the thought of not being with you, of not having you here with me. I don’t deserve a second chance. I know that. And I think what you and Ahk have is a good thing. You deserve that. I’m hella jealous for sure. But I won’t come between the two of you.”

“Jed,” Octavius whispers sitting up and swinging his leg around the bleacher bench so he too is straddling it. “There is nothing between Ahkmenrah and me. That kiss, it was..it was just a thing that happened. There was nothing more to it.”

Jed’s breath catches and he can’t stop the smile from spreading over his face.

“And you’re right. You don’t deserve a second chance.” Octavius keeps his voice low hands reaching over to cover Jed’s. “At least not yet. Go to college. Fall in love with other people. Get your heart broken a few times. And maybe some day we will see each other again. And maybe that day you will deserve your second chance.”

Jed stares down at Octavius’ hands over his. He fights the urge to raise them to his lips and cover them in kisses. He fights the urge to press his hands to Oct’s hips and pull him against his body. Instead he chooses to nod his head and do nothing else.

“Now then,” Octavius states standing up suddenly. “ I have a pizza date with Ahkmenrah that I need to keep.” Octavius walks down a few steps before turning back to face Jed.

“Do you like pizza?” He shouts up. Jed grins and stands up.

“Of course.” He replies.

“Good, you can come with me and help me convince Ahk that sauerkraut does not belong on pizza.”  
“I like sauerkraut on my pizza though.”

“You’re both barbarians!”

“I also like pineapples on my pizza.”

“I have terrible taste in men and you have terrible taste in pizzas.”

Jed laughs as he chest constricts. He hopes that some day is closer to now and far away from never. But at this moment he will enjoy pizza and wait for Octavius to forgive him.

 

fin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I plan to write a holiday themed fic for Jedtavius if I have a chance before the end of December and then I am thinking about maybe writing a prequel or sequel to this story. So there may be more to this in the future. We'll see.

**Author's Note:**

> Alright, as this is obviously an AU, I feel like I should do some explaining for my universe.
> 
> They live in a small farming town in the midwest.
> 
> Jed is still a cowboy, but is also a football player. 
> 
> Octavius is a drama kid
> 
> Teddy is the history teacher
> 
> Sacagawea is the guidance councilor
> 
> McPhee is the principal
> 
> Larry is the security guard
> 
> Ahkmenrah is a foreign exchange student
> 
> Attila is the gym teacher.
> 
> Rexie is the big statue/mascot of the school
> 
> Some other characters will get added in as I think of how I want to implement them.


End file.
